Sunday, February 19, 2006


I've been a little disappointed in the gun-blog community's response to this whole thing. While usually excoriating commentators for pontificating on shit they have never experienced and have no solid information on, bloggers acted the same way. Almost no blogger on my blogroll has ever made any comment about bird hunting. I assume maybe 10% of them have actually experienced it. Yet this is not a hurdle in passing judgement.

Secondly, those who are without sin should cast the first stone. Has nobody violated the much-hyped "four rules of shooting?" I bet every single one of you has at one point or the other. Before hunting on Tuesday I got to see some dipshit reporter on the Early Show (or one of those), with two dumb bitches from the "NY Rifle and Pistol Club," as if such an organization even exists. In any case, they're out there in the middle of Times Square with FUCKING BROOMS to demonstrate how hunter safety is applied. One bitch kept saying, "treat every firearm as if it's loaded and don't put your finger on the trigger until you are ready to fire." To my mind, Cheney knew his gun was loaded and was ready to fire when he put his finger on the trigger, so reciting these rules is specious at best.

These sonsabitches even had a wooden dog. This brings us to another big difference. When I hunted on Tuesday, I was firing at blue quail (I think scaled is the proper reference), whereas, from what I can figger, Cheney was hunting bobwhite quail. Dogs are useless when it comes to blue quail and many shots are at running birds not flying ones. Of course, this brings your muzzle a lot closer to the ground. Cheney was shooting at bobwhite, which flush into the air, like dumb fucks like David Gregory think all birds do.

Another notable "I know guns and hunting, and Cheney should be hung" advocate, is the legendary hunter and scholar, Paul Begala. Here's a couple of golden nuggets from the moron, with appropriate idiocy-correction:

On the notion that a 28 gauge "shoots fewer pellets and has a smaller shot
pattern than a 12 gauge," as the Washington Post reports: That's
true. But no one hunts quail with a 12 gauge. A 12 gauge is used for
high-flying, large birds like geese, ducks and pheasants. If you brought a
12 gauge to a quail hunt you'd be laughed off the ranch...and if you hit a bird
there'd be nothing left but feathers and feet

This is prima-facia stupid. This may be the difference between bobwhite and blue quail. In the case of blue, you've got to run after the little fuckers. If you can tag it with an improved choke, you're not doing badly. Maybe 28 gauge is the preferred caliber in Southern Texas, but no one is going to laugh at you if you bring a 12 gauge to a blue quail hunt in southern NM.

Third: It is not best practice - in fact it's unsafe - to send 3 guns into
the field and to chase 2 coveys at once. I would never - ever - go chasing
a second covey while someone else was occupied with a first covey. My
experience is that safe quail hunters generally hunt no more than 2 guns
in the field at a time, and chase one covey at a time. To do otherwise is

Our big problem was that there was only two of us hunting. For two guys to flush out all the birds in a covey that may be spread out over an entire field is a shitload of time and walking. Ideally, 6 guys can cover a lot of territory. Additionally, if the bird is flying laterally, more than one shooter can fire on it.

As far as multiple coveys, bring them on. I hit a point where I was hitting more birds than I could keep track of where they fell.

While hunting accidents do happen, this one may have been avoidable - if Mr.
Cheney and his companions had been less trigger-happy and more prudent

Of course, every hunting accident is avoidable, including this one. As the season has concluded, outside of the veep, I've heard of two other pepperings amongst people I know.

The blogosphere, gunnies as well, like to get ahead of this sort of shit; beat the MSM, have more expertise, etc. It doesn't make any difference if you actually know what the fuck you're talking about, you just have to come off like you know your shit. Well you come off sounding stupid. Cheney fucked up. Who hasn't?

I'll leave you with this pearl of wisdom from Matt Cooper (Time Magazine):

Late night comics are going to be all over it...don't be surprised if you
see lots of jokes about the vice president was trigger happy, or he might have
had better aim if he'd served in Vietnam.


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